Aint an easy thing-keeping my cool
First, i made this one mistake of talking to a psycho- ok. He beleives he's the perfect man. Guy is a contradiction. Am sure he breathes in contradiction too.. :). So one moment he's ranting about how he'll never get in touch with me because i stood him up. Next hour he's promising to pay for cab fare for me to go visit him. And on and on he goes. After that he rants all across social media about how women are such terrible creatures and he denied any direct connection with what he was going through.
So, I'll mini-undress him. Let's call him Cy Beane. Cy is the kind of person who thinks he farts floral scents. No, don't get me wrong, I have no problem with someone having this much faith and belief in them selves but it becomes a problem when u attack my person just because my ideas and beleifs are different from yours. When you outright insult me just because i say no to you or i argue your point of view.....
This line of thought is depressing.
Will create a new post for unpluggin people i come across in my walk along these streets.
Not don with all things depressing this month. But onto happier thingss.
Ram called. He called to apologize. I waited for this call for a long lon time. But by the time it came through, i didnt feel what i thought I'd feel. I thought I'd gloat, rub it in his face and tell him how happy i was. instead, i felt sorry. I felt sorry he was not totally living his fairy tale. I was sorry he was missing me and thinking of me.
Listening to him tell me how he thought abt me beyond just me being the mother of his children made me sorry. He was remembering things i never thought he'd noticed before.
I always thought I was like a piece of bad furniture when we were together. didn't beleive he was actually seeing me.
this soul opening heart breaking speech of his made me sad.
but, karma has no menu.
Next, Mr. Perfect Kiss. alright, he's called MCE. I feel so much happiness and things i can't put to words when I Think of MCE. I am not in love with him, but this chemistry is killing me. Its been years and one would think by now, the feeling would have waned. But everytime we are together, the need to get together again gets stronger.
I feel his gaze across the room.
So, yeah, this week finally ended. I've not been that productive but am happy. Life is to be lived. And am living it. Failures and all. Love and hurts alike. This is the life i've been given.
I pray for a bettee week. Next week, I'll snitch on all these people i hang out with-online, offline and everywhere.
:)
Village Girl
(Mother, Friend, Neighbor)
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