What if? Reminiscing.....

What if a woman?..... I will find the song title, artist and writer's name later on.

Dearly Departed,

You are missed. If I said I missed you every minute, I would be lying. But right now, I miss you.
Especially now. This was our time. And I miss you much more than I have before. We would be exchanging text messages right now.

Sunday Evening into Monday morning was our time. Monday Mid morning into Monday evening and all the way into Sunday Evening. All the time. It was our time.
We laughed, joked, shared meeting minutes, corrected each other's emails.

Suggested an accessory to an outfit for a board meeting. Celebrated office successes.....

I miss our time.

Until the day we put an end to our mysterious relationship and decided to meet.
That marked the end of the random notification 2 minutes after the previous one. Notifying of a poke, message or 'selfie' sent through.
After that dreadful Wednesday night, I had to carefully count the hours before I sent you a 'how are you doing?' (didn't want to appear to clingy/Needy)... many of them went un-replied. The few replied ones had a one word reply.

Last night, I deleted all the messages and pictures we shared. But I couldn't for the love of me, delete them from my mind. Oh, the sound of your voice- I listened to every phone conversation we ever had..until I could repeat each-word for word, chuckle for chuckle.
I deleted those too, but I can still recall them with absolute clarity.

I have come to the conclusion that you are gone. With so many 'What if's' playing around in my head and heart... I now pronounce you.....

Dearly Departed. 

Here is a quick one to send you off:

Dearly Departed e-Crush,

With utmost sincerity, I hope you are doing well. 

I failed to keep you in my area but then again, you were never mine to keep.

However much I would have loved for you to stay, and however sorry I was that you left, 

I am actually glad you went away.

See, I had become a different person, someone even I didn't recognize anymore.

With your departure however, I have become a more appreciated person. My Utility bills are much lower now, since all the electronics are not on constant charge. I laugh more heartily, and I am slowly but surely getting over you.

Wish you find peace up there in the clouds.

Faithfully,

Me.

..............
I believe I have exorcised all my ghosts regarding this one.

NOTE: Many a time, we get attached to things, people, habits that are very hard to break or let go of. We may or may not notice that these things are eating into our daily lives, affecting our most important relationships and killing us slowly.

I once attempted to get over a  Habit and a few of those steps actually worked. It takes work though and support from friends, family and enemies.